I have to admit I am a bit bored right now and other ramblings …..

I am dealing with some boredom issues lately and that is not like me. I have tons of books, but just cannot settle down to read. I was working on my etsy store, but with only three sales in a month with 300 views I am a bit reluctant to spend much more on listing if I am not selling anything. I am just not able to figure out why ? I seem to be blocked no matter what I do. Someone will ask for my card, they want to buy something and then I never hear from them. I even tried to show pictures one day and my iphone refused to pull up my etsy account, it is really weird. So, I am a bit lost now that that huge project is on hold. I have so much to list, hundreds of items and had planned on working on that every week, but now, with that packed away for now, I am at a total loss and I am also bored stupid !

It is the first time since I became a mom at 20, that my life is my own.  I am 52 years old. I do not have to work around kids, or grandkids schedules and that is just weird. I think I am just finding my place right now. My husband is at work and I am  home all day without a car, so that makes it a bit hard sometimes, but I am doing okay , why in the heck did my font change, I kept trying to go back and start typing over, but it changed anyway, weird !!

I am just taking it a day at a time, trying to figure out how to lose weight, I am really sick of being huge and just want to get this weight off but it is really not happening. Just finished an eight week stint on low carb with zero results. I had one cheat meal at day ten because my hubby was starting with me the next day. We followed the diet by the book, and neither of us lost a bit over the next almost seven weeks, so we are going to try something else. It is such a hard diet to be on, so we will find something not quite so impossible to do long term.

We have four of our  grandkids coming over this weekend, my husbands exact words when I told him the second two were coming was, are you crazy ? lol. I told him no, they will entertain each other and they are all old enough it will be fine. I am very exicted about it and I think he is too !! Four kids, no more pool, too cold and it will be a very cold weekend, so it will be interesting !! I know McDonaldsa indoor playground will be a key player in the weekend plans !!

Anyway. Just in a rambling kind of mood. I will seee if I can post a picture of the park, not sure I can post chihully on the blog, but I can post pictures of the actual park.

To change the subject, the Chihuly exhibit has been extended at the Dallas arboretum until the end of the year and we are both very excited about that. we are so in love with that exhibit and the arboretum itself, we are going to buy a season pass and enjoy it as many times as we can before it is gone in nine or ten weeks !! We both love to take pictures and was that an amazing exhibit !!

I just cannot get my computer to download the picures, it took ten minutes to get the one of the tree.

Okay, well, I am off to find something to do, not sure what, but I am just in that kind of mood tonight !!!

These are the things I know

I have to say, life is pretty good these days. I am enjoying finding out what it is like for my hubby and I to live alone after 30 plus years living with our kids. I miss everyone, being an hour away, but I am happy learning to be by myself and it is a new experience. We have a lovely, very quiet apartment with a gorgeous view of a creek bed and trees. So wonderful and relaxing. Two bedrooms and two bathrooms, what luxury, and I use both bathrooms, just because I can !!!

I am continuing to work on finding me, I finally have the time to be me, but still have not really figured out who I am yet. After a lifetime of raising kids and helping with grandkids, I am still not exactly sure who I am.

These are the things I know about me so far.

this is seperate from me the Mom, grandma, wife, aunt, sister, and so on, this is just me. I am trying to figure out myself so I am trying to understand myself better. I know I love my family and friends, it is me that is a mystery after all these years !!

I am passionate about photography, it is probably the thing I love most and when I miss a good photo opp, it really bothers me. I have a few shots I never took, that years later, I still am mad about, lol !! I think with my camera most of the time when I am out and about, oh, look, that would be a great picture, that kind of thing and my iphone and pink elph cannon point and shoot are always with me. I need a ten step program. My six year old computer has , no lie, over 14, 000 pictures on it. The box for my new computer says it holds 170,000 pictures, or something like that. I think I will be okay for a while.  My cell phone had 1500 until I moved some to the computer and deleted them off the phone, I have had it one year this month. I still have over a thousand on it. No kidding.

I love to create, with beads, paint, stamps, words, a camera, being an artist is who I am and I have to create.

I need to write. I find when I write, I am happier. I love blogging, writing poems, emails and even texts. I am list maker too and I know it is because I love to write.

I love to bake ,and have always baked for our family. It is how I show my love sometimes.

I procrastinate, badly. I can put things off like crazy when I do not want to deal with them, and that is not a good thing.

I love chocolate and I  eat chocolate when I am happy, sad, hormonal, bored, mad,  you get the picture, I love chocolate !! I do not really eat it as much as I would like to though.

I get overwhelmed easily, like right now with a studio full of stuff to list on my etsy store, my ADD kicks in and I get frozen and do not know what to do first, a big issue I am working on. I have only been dealing with it my entire life, but it is time to overcome some of those bad habits, I have to push through when I get overwhelmed !!

I am content right now. Just happy to be where I am, and who I am , even if I am not sure who that is right now. I like being where I am in life and looking forward to finding new dreams and  goals.

I know there is a lot more, but it is late and my brain is tired !!

Here are some pictures I have taken , and when I have taken one, there are usually at least 200 more !! I am usually the official event photographer at the  grand kids parties, I cannot help it, I love to take pictures !!

not sure why, but I love to take pictures of traffic lights, have better ones from upstate NY but they are on my old computer and I cannot  get to them !!

Well, I am pushing it, when I try to add too many pictures to my blog, it starts putting them in the wrong places, so I had best stop while I am ahead !! This was not too show I am a wonderful photographer, I know I am not, I am still  learning !! T hey are  just to show  that I love to take so many kinds of pictures and to share a few favorites of mine . I have  hundreds of the grand kids, but I cannot post them without permission. They are not my kids to share and some parents do not like thier kids pictures online so I work hard to respect that !!

So, another great day and looking forward to a really nice day tomorrow !! Thanks for stopping by !!  I am happy to share my journey with whoever wants to share it with me  !!

Life is good these days !!

I have to say I have been really enjoying life these days. Miss my hubby a lot as he is working a lot of overtime, but I have been keeping busy and really enjoying this stage of my life.

We recently started a low carb diet due to us both having severe sensitivity to wheat and we both have lost all our symptoms and feel better, no real weight loss yet but I am learning to bake and cook wheat and carb free and it has been a lot of fun. I never knew you could bake low carb and have stuff that tastes great, so that has been fun !!

My etsy site is getting more posts every day, I am pleased to be seeing more items in my store, still a very , very, long way from where I am looking to be, but I can only list so many a day and there is so much to list  and still to photograph , let alone bag and label, it is a a bit overwelmeing but exciting too !! My desk is piled with the stuff I plan to do tomorrow, a bit ambitious, but we will see   !!! I have buckets of stuff to still do, so it will take a few months of lots  of hours per day and week, but I am really excited to do it !!

I want to work on some writing projects but my old computer , where they live, is not  hooked up to the printer so I am a bit stuck and I am old fashioned and will not write unless I can print out the new material for paper back up, so I am sure that will get taken care of this weekend  !!  It seems like I am going all day and I need to get more focused but I will get there and get a nice schedule in place and go from there !!

So, busy life, but happy life, blogging, writing, my photography when possible,  listing on Etsy, playing with the beads and buttons getting them ready to sell,  spending time with my hubby and when we get a chance our kids and grand kids, visiting with friends when possible and by phone when not possible and a pile of good books when I am ready to take a break, let alone a pantry full of new baking ingrediants for our new life style !!  Life is pretty darn good these days and I am just getting started !!  Can’t wait to see what I come up with next, it should be good !!!

Here is that pile for tomorrow , a bit overly ambitious, I have to say, lol !!! I say aim high and see where you land, if you aim too low you might hit the target but not do as much as you would have if you aimed a bit too high and missed  !!!