Find your passion, do what you love…

I have to admit I am a bit frustrated with all the  “advice ” out there. They are all so full of hope and enthusiasm but what are they really saying ?

Follow your bliss, do what you love, find your passion, and so on.

I love making  jewelry, I am enthralled with beads. Love them. Love creating and pretty much everyone that looks at my stuff says I do nice work and they think I am good at designing and making pretty, good quality pieces.

That said, I can’t sell it. I have had it on Artfire, etsy, and now YARDSELLR and one piece on another selling site, and in a stall in a store,  nothing. I have sold a few pieces in several years, other then to friends, I have sold probably ten or twelve pieces in the last year or two , including some special orders, to friends. Some have bought several pieces , but that is it No store or online sales . I get lots of views, hundreds, but despite being competitive with my prices, despite being told how lovely my stuff is, I just do not sell it.

I have been designing and creating jewelry for over twenty years and at what point do you step back and say, hmm, this is obviously not what I am supposed to do , or do you keep on trying because it is your passion and you love it ? The problem is, when you take a passion and try hard to make money at it and don’t, you start to lose the passion. So, now, no income from doing something you love, and you no longer love to do it.

So, I wish someone would really tell us how we are supposed to know what it is that we are supposed to do , and how we figure it out. How do we keep from losing our passion for that thing we love to do, when we work so hard, hundreds of  hours of labor and thousands of dollars over the years in materials, let alone putting your heart and soul into your work ,  and you are not getting anywhere ?  It is sad to lose your passion for something because you tried to make it your life work, but it did not work ?

So, I am not sure what to do. It is all on hold while we move but I am at a lost as to whether or not I want to have a studio or not at the new place  ? I am tired of tyring so hard, knowing how much work and love and time went in to my pieces and then seeing them just sit here month after month. When you create things, they are like children, you put yourself into them and then to have them sit unwanted hurts.

So my real issue is just  I am not sure how to find the answer to this question. I love to do other things to, but so far those have not succeeded either. We love yard sale shopping and thrift sale shopping and selling in an antique store, but when I end the six month contract this time,end of next month,  I doubt I will have even come close to breaking even, despite marking a bunch down and hoping it all sells, because even if it does, I will probably still not break even.  So, strike two on my list, lol !! We have tried this before and had about the same results. Did a bit better that time, but still when it was all said and done , we probably just barely broke even.

So, I guess I have to continue to search and find something else to love. Oh, I really do  love real estate, wanted to be an agent,  had to wait until the kids were grown to look into it, right about that time, they closed up all the local classes to become a realtor because of the economy. Several realtors I know have told me that it is not the time to get into it now. Another one bites the dust.

 I also love to write and do have some projects I am working on, but I am not sure if that is what I am supposed to do either . I am starting to get a bit leary about it all. I do not want to kill my joy in that too by getting my hopes up about a future in writing.

Anyway, the point of this blog entry was just to vent. I wish all these people that make so much money by telling us this generic stuff, would actually give us some honest direction.

Lets face it , if doing what we love made all of us rich, there would be a lot of couch potato, chip eating millionaires out there, or thousands of people making millions playing games  and posting on facebook and poking  each other via facebook ,  yours truely included !!!

So, for now, I will just keep trying and for now maybe, pull back on the beads so I do not lose my passion completely. It will jsut be a great hobby and I will have one amazing jewelry box.

I would really love ot hear how others have found thier path and how they went about taking the first steps and figuring it all out.  I will never give up, but I am ready to find something I can work hard and get some success at !!  I think I have done enough stuff that has not worked !!!

Oh, and that entire believe in yourself, that is great, but others do have to believe in your vision too, or they do not buy what you are selling.  There has to be a balance somewhere !! You can believe all you want but if no one wants what you are selling, it does not matter, but if you do not believe in yourself you will never get a good idea up and running either, so it is important, but you have to make sure you believe in the right thing. THAT is what I what to find out how to do ? It is all very  hard to figure out at this point !!

Changing habits

Changing habits is a hard thing to do. Even when you want the change pretty badly. I have been wanting to lose weight and get our finances in better shape, as far as saving money goes, we pay our bills , so that is fine, but we do not seem to get much of whats left over into the bank and that is frustrating me . Getting out of  the bad habits that keep us where we are , seem to be a huge uphill climb.

I have often said, when contemplating the 125 pounds I have to lose, that it seems like I am  looking up 125  stairs, and having to jump up them with one foot and one hand tied behind  my  back, a very scary and seemingly impossible thing to do. That , however is just my perception, the reality is not quite so bad, I just have to overcome my own bad habits and even some self defeating thoughts .

I do not hate myself and tell myself all kinds of bad things because I am fat. No, I really have come to an accepting place w ith myself and I can actually treat myself as I would a loved one who was heavy and needed help, with love, not contempt.  We will never accomplish any goals if we have self contempt. I do realize I am the same person, fat or thin, so if I do not love myself fat, I will not love myself thin.  I have a husband and children and grandchildren and friends that think I am valuable and lovable, so why would I think I am not , just because I am fat ?

Now, that said. I do not accept the fat as just the way it will be. I am not comfortable with it, and do not like seeing the parts of me that are so heavy, like my stomach. I refuse however, to see it as discustinng and less then, it is just something I need to take care of, and learn lessons from.   There are reasons I got this heavy and frankly, it really does not matter to me why, I think too many people waste too much time trying to figure out why they got fat instead of figuring out how to get unfat. I need to eat better , and excercise. The endrocrinologist told me I have metobolic syndrome and it will make it harder to lose weight but that I can do it.I am very determined as we make our move to our new place to really look at it as a huge opportunity to make some of the big changes I want so much. With less daily obligations I will have the time to concentrate on what is important to me. I want to prepare healthy meals and eat at home most of the time, really cutting down our eating out to a time or two a month , a very bad habit we have right now.

My husband needs to lose weight too, not as much as me, but a significant amount so we are in this together and  have the same feelings about it. We know with the stress of the move and all we have to do to finish up fixing this house up for our kids to rent and  getting the yard sale stuff put together and have the yard sale before we move, and the actual move, we are probably not going to make as many good decisions as we should ,but , we will try to at least do better and then once we move, we will not have any more excuses  , we will really get moving.

Next week when he is home earlier every day on his new shift, we will start walking , so that will be a positve thing. A small start but one that will help with our stress and start our process of getting back into shape and feeling good again, we both do not have the energy we should.

Then, once we move, with all the wonderful activities we have available at the new apartment, we can swim in the lap pool, walk or bike the five mail cement trail, or use the 24 hour gym, and we plan to use them all  on a every day basis, we are so excited !!

So, I think when we have some bad habits, we have to want to change them bad enough and then just start doing the things that we want. Maybe  small steps, not everyone can  move and start all over, but we can start with one thing, like we are with the walking before we move, and making some better food choices, even if it is a whole wheat bun with the hamburger we grill, or  adding some veggies , some small thing to start.

It can be done, but we have to learn to be kind to ourselves. We would never beat up a friend who was struggling the way we can ourselves at times. How many times I have said , I am so stupid, when I do something, well, eh, stupid, lol, but now I do not say that, I will say, oops, or that was dumb, but NOT, I AM  dumb.

We have to love ourselves to get where we want to be. We are all loveable, even with our faults, no one is perfect, so we need to be more forgiving and loving  to ourselves and then we will find it easier to be loving and forgiving to others.  

As the old saying goes, one day at a time, really, that is all we can do, but we can do anything if we really want it and are willing to go for it, just that one day, one step at a time.

I would love to hear how others have changed their bad habits and made positve changes in their lives  !!

Off the wagon

I have not been here in about a month. I have lost a few pounds and kept them off, but I am still not doing what I need to be doing to get this weight off.

We are in the middle of getting ready for a big move. We bought our house over ten years ago and decided to rent it out to our oldest daughter and her family so we can move up by my husbands work. He currently drives an hour each way and will only have to drive 15 or so mintues once we move. The stress of the move and preparing for a huge yard sale before we move ,  has really caused my hubby and I to not eat as well as we should be eating.

The good news is the new place, a very nice apartment comes with so many awesome ways to get excercise. Lap pool, five mile hiking and biking trail, all cement, a 24 hour gym, and we plan to use them all. Also being in a second story apartment will cause us to climb s tairs at least once a day !!

So, I am still standing in my truth, I weighed today and I am 250.5 and that is a better then where I started but a huge gap from where I need to be.  I am going to starting trying harder to work on it for the next 25 days until we move, not that I am counting, lol, but once we move, it will be a fresh start and we plan to take full advantage of it !!

I will try to post in the next few weeks, more often, but once we move my obligations will be a lot less and I will be working hard on my goals and posting almost daily at that point !!

Thanks for stopping by !!